The Morning After: That’s why he’s the f#&%ing ace people!

That’s right LA of Anaheim of Orange County of California of you get the damn idea. That’s right, Josh Beckett is out to get you. In his Texan dialect, he done hunted your ass down once now. He’s got the scent, and if he has to again, he’ll shoot Jon Lackey right between the eyes.

Ahh, screw it Josh. Go get some. Sox fans won’t judge, you deserve it.

Or many he can leave that to Big Papi and Kevin Youkilis. They certainly did a suitable job of that last night.

But the story, not shockingly, was Beckett’s dominance. At one point he mowed down 19 straight. Nineteen! It’s almost preposterous. And not only did Beckett’s dominance thoroughly frustrate the entire Angels lineup - OK, Vlad the Impaler got a hold of two different pitches that looked impossible to hit and stroked them for singles, but he is Vlad the Impaler - it also saved the Sox bullpen, which can now lineup Hideki Okajima on nearly a full week of rest, not to mention the Irish jigger himself, Jonathan Papelbon.

So, what can you give the guy who just nearly duplicated his epic postseason performance of 2003? What do you give the man who is now riding an 18-inning scoreless streak? Or, because this is The Morning After, who?

You give him the ultimate baseball blogger (seriously, how the hell did she earn that title so fast?), the woman who finally gave up her attempt to sleep through the LA Dodgers rotation (the whole lot of which combined doesn’t have Beckett’s stuff): Alyssa Milano.

Wait, he’s already been there, in 2003? Well, who the hell cares? Alyssa Milano’s still hot. Smoking hot. And Josh Beckett is still nasty. Filthy nasty.

Charmed may have been one of the worst shows of all-time. But it did give birth to this scene, so I think we’re going to call it even.

So we’re hooking it up again. Joshie deserves it after last night. And just think of the possibilities. The last time he was with Ms. Milano, Josh Beckett was sizing up his first World Series ring. Too bad it had an ugly fish on it.

Maybe this time he can get another one, one that might even be a bit prettier. If he gets help from Dice-K tomorrow and Curt Schilling Sunday, he’ll be well on his way.

– Cameron Smith